Emotional Distress
From Space Tree Wiki
| Space Tree Episode #22 |
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Space Tree inherits two million pizzolas and is promptly sued by Commander who is then sued by Mee. Basically, there's lot of suing involved. In the end, Space Tree gets a bunch of pizza and finds out Mee isn't his father.
Cast (in order of appearance): Commander, Space Tree, SpeshDiv Robot, Mee, Luzini
Places: Space Tree's Ship, Space Court
Page title: how can i resist you
Running time: 3:45
Date: 31. March, 2005
Contents |
Transcript
{Open to Commander hitting nails into a bunch of planks crudely nailed together.}
COMMANDER: Come on, you stupid wooden piece of crap.
SPACE TREE: {enters from right} And your time is up! Did you finish it?
COMMANDER: I sure did, Space Trizzle, and it's all yours.
{Cut to a close up of the "chair". Space Tree walks over to it}
SPACE TREE: What the? Looks like a piece of crap.
COMMANDER: I have you know that this so-called piece of crap took months of planning and production to uh-
SPACE TREE: Looks like you just nailed a bunch of wood together at the last minute because you spent the whole week procrastinating.
COMMANDER: I was not! Oh, wait, you said procrastinating, right?
SPACE TREE: Yeah.
COMMANDER: Well, yeah I was doing that, but we had a deal. Now where's my 72-inch plasma screen?
SPACE TREE: That wasn't even the deal. I said I'd give you twenty dollars if you could build me an ergonomic chair in a week.
COMMANDER: And that's what I did! So wha-
SPACE TREE: You've done nothing, so you don't get jack.
COMMANDER: Oh, well, whatever. You know we had a verbal contractual agreement. If you don't like it, then why don't you just go buy your own chair at a friggin' store.
SPACE TREE: Well, yeah, that's a good idea, but where the heck is a tree like me going to get that kind of money.
{A small white envelope hits Commander in the eye and he falls over}
COMMANDER: Aaah! Su- ch- Why is it always my eye?! God!
SPACE TREE: Hey, that looks like a note. {he takes the note out of Commander's eye}
COMMANDER: Yeah, it does. Maybe I should read it with my bleeding cornea or whatever.
SPACE TREE: According to this, my great-cousin Luzini has died and left me his fortune of two million pizzolas.
COMMANDER: Pizzolas? {he suddenly gets up} How much is that in space dollars?
SPACE TREE: Two million.
COMMANDER: We're rich!
SPACE TREE: {now wearing sunglasses and a dollar-sign golden necklace signaling he's rich} Correction! I'm rich!
COMMANDER: Well, all I ask is my twenty dollars for the chair, plus a new eye, and a few thousand for emotional distress.
SPACE TREE: Screw you.
COMMANDER: Then I'll see you in court!
{Cut to Space Court. The SpeshDiv robot is behind a podium that simply says "LAW"}
SPESHDIV: Space Court finds in favor of Commander Uderick Xander for the sum of two million pizzolas. {a gavel hits the podium with a gavelish noise}
COMMANDER: {his hand raises} Yeah!
{Cut back to Space Tree's Ship with Space Tree and the Commander, who now has a glass eye and the money necklace.}
COMMANDER: So now who's the rich one, huh?
SPACE TREE: Yeah, well, none of that money was for your piece of crap chair. {exits}
COMMANDER: {gasps} You son of a bitch!
{One of Mee's portals opens up and Mee walks out of it.}
MEE: Hey, blonde kid, I heard you scored yourself a few pizzolas.
COMMANDER: I sure did. Hey, watch out for the blood there. {points at floor}
MEE: What? {falls} Whoa! Ow, my whiplash!
{Cut again to Space Court. The SpeshDiv robot is again the judge.}
SPESHDIV: Space Court finds in favor of Meelord Marone to the sum of two million pizzolas. {a baseball bat hits the podium this time}
MEE: {hand raises} Yeah!
{Cut back to the ship. Mee and Commander are standing and one of Mee's portals is on the ground. Mee now has the money necklace and Commander has an eight ball in place of his glass eye}
MEE: So now who's the rich one, huh?
COMMANDER: Can I at least have my glass eye back?
MEE: No. {jumps into his portal}
{One screen wipe later, Space Tree is sitting in his ergonomic chair.}
SPACE TREE: I don't really get how this is supposed to improve my posture and uh-
{Mee's portal opens up and Mee flies out of it, tackling Space Tree in the process.}
MEE: Whoa, that wasn't supposed to happen. Oh, hey, Space Tree. What's up?
SPACE TREE: Nothin' much.
MEE: Uh, I didn't injure you just then, did I?
SPACE TREE: I'm afraid you did.
MEE: Aw, but you looked like you had such great posture.
{Cut again to Space Court.}
SPESHDIV: Space Court finds in favor of Space Tree the Space Tree for the sum of two mi-i-i-i-i-i-l-l {its head goes crazy and explodes and a gavel hits the podium}
SPACE TREE: {hand raises} Yeah! Hey, wait.
{Cut to Mee and Space Tree sitting down, still in Space Court}
MEE: Well, well. Looks like the ball is in my pants now.
SPACE TREE: Yeah, well, I know what he was going to say. Two million pizzolas, pay up!
MEE: Oh, really. Let's just see what Mr. Judge has to say about that. {walks up near the podium with SpeshDiv, whose body is still intact but lacks a head} Excuse me mister blown-up judge, what are you- Hey, wait, what's this. {picks up the robot and looks at the back} Luzini's Pizzolas?
SPACE TREE: {walks over} Hey, that's my dead cousin's store.
MEE: What, did he own a bank?
SPACE TREE: No, a pizza place.
MEE: {throws SpeshDiv off-screen} So wait, does that just mean "pizzola" is just your dead cousin's idiot word for pizza?
SPACE TREE: Hey, if he's such an idiot, why did he leave me his forture? Although, I guess it does make sense that he left me pizzas and not money. After all, he was kind of an idiot.
MEE: Geez, you can keep your friggin' pizzolas. I don't need the carbs. {starts walking off}
SPACE TREE: Hey, thanks.
MEE: {opens a portal} Well, I'll see you later, I've gotta get back to the wife.
SPACE TREE: You're married? To who?
MEE: Oh, just {camera pans in for effect} your momma! {ducks through the portal}
SPACE TREE: My momma? Well, then that means {gasps} Mee Marone is my father!
MEE: {appears out of Space Tree} No it doesn't, I was kidding. {ducks away again}
SPACE TREE: Well, then that means that {gasps} my dead cousin Luzini is my father!
MEE: No, it doesn't! Shut up!
SPACE TREE: You know, if you don't like what I'm saying, you can just leave.
(we see Commander where the SpeshDiv robot was)
COMMANDER: This whole freakin system's out of order!
MEE: (pulls out a shotgun) Oh, that's it, you're dead.
(Luzini pops out from the bottom of the screen)
LUZINI: Mama mia!
(roll end credits)
Triva
Because of events in Space Package and Space Vision and this episode, both of Commander X's eyes have now been replaced.
External Links
