Forescore Jones: Zombie Hunter: Werewolf Hair
From Space Tree Wiki
Forescore Jones: Zombie Hunter #1
Forescore Jones decides to wear a wig.
Cast (in order of appearance): Forescore Jones, Stranger, Wigmaker
Places: Street
Running time: 1:33
Date: 9. November 2007 (?)
Contents |
Transcript
{Scene is a street. Forescore is wearing a brown wig and talking to the camera, alone.}
Forescore: My name is Forescore Jones. And yes, today I have decided to wear a toupe. I just thought I'd try it out for a while, its not like I'm trying to fool anybody about the fact that I am slightly bald. I may be trying to fool zombies. But thats it.
Stranger: Hey, nice hair man.
Forescore: Uh, thank you.
{Stranger sniffs the air twice}
Stranger: Kind of smells like a werewolf.
{Forescore bends down and squints angrily}
Forescore: What'd you say?
Stranger: It totally smells like a werewolf, man. It must be made out of werewolf hair. You know, the hair of a werewolf.
Forescore: Why would anybody make a wig out of werewolf hair?
Stranger: Aha, so it is a wig!
{Scene shifts to wig shop, a ding is heard}
Wigmaker: Ah, my most recent customer! Come back for more, eh--
Forescore: {Interrupting} You sold me werewolf hair! The hair of a ****ing werewolf! Explain yourself!
Wigmaker: Well I never--
Forescore: {Interrupting, poking the wigmaker} Where'd you get this werewolf hair from anyways? Are you a werewolf?
Wigmaker: No, I'm just a toupe salesman--
Forescore: Well you listen to me, Jason Bateman, if I find out you're lyin to me, I'm gunna shove this silver bullet (Holds up silver bullet) right up your werewolf anus. And then I'm going to shoot another one directly into your heart. (A slide flipping sound is heard. A slide is shown depecting that event. Another slide is shown depecting a confused wigmaker.) Cuz the first one? That isn't even going to kill you. But trust me its going to be pretty goddamn uncomfortable. (A slide is shown where a younger Forescore Jones is standing in front of some people/statues waving. The next scene shows Forescore Jones writing in a book as he speaks) And you're going to have that goddamn thing up your werewolf anus for the rest of your life, including the afterlife, because its going to stay there in werewolf heaven. {Slams book shut, vertically} Because thats how the afterlife works! Now please. Give me another toupe, and this one better be (Holds up sign) 99.999% free of werewolf hair.
{Back outside. Forescore is wearing a blonde wig.}
Stranger: Hey, nice hair man.
Forescore: Yeah. It doesn't smell like a werewolf at all, does it?
Stranger: Nope! It smells like someone pissed on it for two hours, then ate it, then vomited the whole thing back onto your bald head!
Forescore: But it doesn't smell like a werewolf.
Stranger: Nope. It's definetly not werewolf hair.
Forescore: {Now holding a balloon, and his shirt reads #1} Yep! It looks like Forescore Jones wins this round.
Fun Facts
Remarks
- Viewers were able to see this episode in the Splastik Player on the Keentoons Main Page, as a part of Keentoons trying to promote Forescore Jones as a spin-off of Space Tree. It was also planned to distribute this spin-off via mobile phones, as told in this Interview with Chris Crosby. However, this project now seems to be abandoned and the Splastik Player, including this episode was removed from the Main Page.
External Links
