Space Slave
From Space Tree Wiki
| Space Tree Episode #4 |
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Episode Description: It's Ladies' Night at the Space Bar, and The Commander has a perfect plan, involving blackmail and cross-dressing, to obtain this free ladies-only alcohol. OR DOES HE?
Cast (in order of appearance): Commander, Space Tree, Black Kid
Places: Space Tree's Ship
Page title: big fat idiot tree from space
Running time: 4:10
Date: 28. October 2004
Contents |
Transcript
(roll opening credits)
(Open to Space Tree's space ship. There is text reading: This is like a space ship.)
Commander: Hey Space Tree, check this out man. (Cut to the inside of the ship, the Commander enters holding a flyer.)
Commander: It's Ladies' night down at the space bar. So chicks drink for free!
Space Tree: So? What do you care? First of all, you're not a woman and second you're not even old enough to drink.
Commander: Yeah, then here's what we should do, alright? You go down there, and then you milk this scam for all its worth, (holds up a carton of MILK, tosses it into some glass) and then bring me back some free booze and I drink it here. Cuz the man isn't going to come into my own house and arrest me, is he? Know what I'm sayin'?
Space Tree: Well this is my house, not yours... and w-what are you talking about anyway, I can't get any free beer either, I'm not a woman.
Commander: THEY don't know that! Come on, there's no way of telling with you. You dont even have any, uh...you don't have uh, heh, you know what I mean...
Space Tree: Oh, right right, I know what you mean. The hell you talking about?
Commander: You dont have a couple of, uh... yeah actually, how do you even know what gender you are? Theres no way of knowing.
Space Tree: Oh, I know what I am.
Commander: Well maybe we should do some tests, just to confirm. And if it turns out you ARE a chick, then you go get me some beer, baby!
Space Tree: No, we won't be doing that.
Commander: Come on, it'll be funny.
Space Tree: No, it won't.
Commander: Well I'm doin' it. We'll start by putting on different articles of clothing, and seeing how you respond to each one, alright?
(Space Tree has a thought bubble saying "what")
Commander: First I'll put on these pants. (Holds up pants) So, uh... how exactly am I supposed to put these on you, I mean, without the legs-
Space Tree: Uh, just nail them in, man, whatever.
Commander: Nail them - won't that hurt?
Space Tree: It doesnt matter, just - here's a hammer do it. (Hands Commander a hammer)
Commander:Well, OK.
Space Tree: You'll need this box of nails too. (Drops NAILZ box on floor)
Commander: OK.
Space Tree: Put some nails in there.
Commander: Here I go.
Space Tree: Just do it, what, are you scared?
(The commander starts to nail on the pants)
Space Tree: Ow, ow, Ow, OW! (One of his branches falls off)
Commander: Sorry, are you OK?
Space Tree: Yes I'm fine, now do the other side. Ow, ow, OwOW!
Commander: K, it's done.
Space Tree: Finally. Now I know how Buddha felt. When he was nailed to a christmas tree. Y'know?
Commander: Yeah. So, how do the pants feel, man? (Holds up sign that matches his dialogue)
Space Tree: Oh yeah, yeah, they're pretty good. I guess. What else you got?
Commander: OK, next I'll put this on you. (Holds up a bra, smiles) Heh.
Space Tree: Alright.
Commander: (Hangs the Bra over Space Tree's face/trunk) So, whats that like?
Space Tree: Yeah, it's pretty good.
Commander: Yeah, I bet it is. Now you should put these on (puts a pair of pink shoes on Space Tree), and you should wear this (puts white bunny ears on), and the illusion is complete! Yeah!
Space Tree: Illusion? (Waving his arms) Wait, I thought this was supposed to be some kind of test.
Commander: What? Oh oh right yeah yeah its a test.
Space Tree: Wait a minute... (As he says this a large speech bubble flies in with that dialogue, then flies off) I look ridiculous, don't I?
Commander: No no, not at all, no. (Pulls out camera, takes a picture)
Space Tree: HEY! Give me that camera!
Commander: Haha! (throws the camera off-screen) Now I have the evidence!
Space Tree: Evidence? (The word flies across the background)
Commander: Blackmail evidence! And I will broadcast this photograph, live on the internet unless you (points at Space Tree with foam finger) become my slave for a month. HaHA!
Space Tree: A month? Nah, I don't think thats really worth it.
Commander: Well then, I'll put this on the website, man.
Space Tree: Yeah, I don't care. Do what you want.
Commander: No wait, how about you be my slave for 2 weeks? (holds up 2 fingers)
Space Tree:No.
Commander: (his face is different, like Speshdiv, holds up 1 finger and 1 bloody half finger) 1.5 weeks. Thats my final offer...1 week.
Space Tree: No, man, I'm not bein' your slave.
Commander: Okay then, how about this. (His arm launches off his body like a missile, exit stage left) You get me a beer and we'll call it even.
Space Tree: No.
Commander: (From a screen labeled 'the internet!') Come on! It could be light beer even! (Screen goes to static, Commander walks in) You see what happened, Space Tree? You could've just got me that beer but no, you're all over the inter-night in that ridiculous getup, (holds up screen of dancing space tree) and now who looks like the big fat idiot tree from space? Not me, thats for sure! (Points at self, starts bleeding)
Space Tree: What are you talking about, man? This ridiculous getup has become the worlds most popular fashion and I've already made 500,000 dollars off of it (His gloved hand makes "air quotes" as he says ridiculous getup) Just check out this box of money. (Tosses box O' cashTM to Commander)
Commander: What? Where's my box?
Space Tree: Well, as a special thanks, I did get you that beer you wanted. (Hands commander a beer.)
Commander: Thanks man, I knew you'd come around sooner or later.
Black Kid: (pops out of Beer) Are you ready to rock?
(The Black Kid looks at the Commander.)
(roll end credits)
Fun Facts
- The music in this episode is credited to 'joe "busy" bee'.
Trivia
- Never before or since has Space Tree wiggled his 'fingers'.
External Links
- Watch "Space Slave"
- View the flash file for "Space Slave"
- Watch "Space Slave" as a part of the keentoons Podcast
